Personal Development

What you give value to has power over you

(Previously published on 12th January 2015)

This is certainly one life truth that I have learnt and will share. Until about 4 weeks ago when my most cherished ‘only 1 year old’ blackberry phone fell into hot soapy pedicure water to never come on again (you’ll probably have seen my FB cry out), I was an attached, hooked on, never giving up my BB phone fanactic (if at all that sums up my love for the bb). What I must confess is that I actually had a new iphone 5 phone, which remained unopened and unused, even at the point I got my BB (the 3rd of its kind). But my reluctance to give up the BB at the time did not allow me get acquainted with the iphone. But it took my bb falling into water and being declared unrepairable, to get me to recognise the amazing world of possibilities on the iphone.

Okay let me make it clear – this is not about me advertising the iphone.. Loool!! But it’s me admitting that I don’t know why I waited so long to realise that I could have been doing so many more things and saved some money, if I had at the time of getting my bb been open to something different, like the iPhone.

I’ll be honest – I’ve never spoilt or had a phone fall in water before, and I am one person that usually can keep the same phone still looking new for 5 years. If this episode of my phone falling in water had happened just 2 years ago, I’ll have been all panicked, worked up and sad for sometime. But I wasn’t. Why? Because life has taught me the process of detachment, and also knowing what is important.

Many of us are like the old me. Scared of giving up the old for fear of uncertainty of the ‘new’, and even more the sentimental values we place on ‘the old’. Let me say this – it is okay to value things and people, but it is worth remembering that life is not stagnant, and we all at one point or the other have to adapt to change. Be careful to not get so attached to something, that it has the ability to make you sick or pull you backwards.

If you are not open to something new, you never know what could be out there; what grounds you could break, or what happiness you could find. You could be bigger and better for it. Trust yourself, and know when to detach, or should I say ‘let go’. For what you give value to has the ability to make you stagnant, move you forward, or pull you back

**Attaching and detaching are 2 opposites we must learn mindset**

© Dr Vivian O. Ikem, 2014

(Previously published on Facebook in May 2014)


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Vivian (Dr Viv) is as vivacious and full of life as her name ‘Vivian’ suggests. She is a Certified Coach, People Builder, Consultant, Speaker and Trainer with a passion for helping ambitious Leaders and individuals build resilience, rediscover their value and potential and thrive in work and life. She is also a Chemical Engineer by background (with a PhD), multiple award winning researcher, ex-management consultant with a top UK based Consulting firm and Founder, The Reset Squad. Inspired by her journey as a high achieving professional and recovering perfectionist who overcame major trauma, depression and sudden change, Vivian taps into her invaluable lessons learnt, to empower and help people reset, rediscover and grow through their experiences. She is the author of Shadows in the Mirror - The Many Faces of Depression and contributing author in Unzenable – A Guide to Stress Less and Be More. To know more, please check out the 'About Vivian' page. Vivian is also available to speak on or discuss issues you may wish to take further personally, or at events. Please use the 'Contact' page to get in touch. Thank you.

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